How Ya Like Me Now?

Posted on 2022.11.17

I could not go to my sister’s wedding alone.

Not when the maid of honour is my ex.

Lifehack: never date your sister’s BFF. They will never break up.

Was I still in love with my ex? No. But at this point one of us had to win the breakup and even though we had broken up a year earlier, I knew that I couldn’t show up looking like I hadn’t moved on. Especially since SHE had broken up with me. I was all set to bring the girl I had been dating,

But yeah. We had just broken up. At least this time it was mutual as she was moving and we didn’t want to do long distance.

But now here I was, a month before my sister’s wedding. Down for a plus one. No plus to bring. To meet someone new and bring them to meet the entire family (and my ex) after a few weeks of dating would be too much pressure for her and for me.

I swear hiring a Companion for this kind of situation was something I saw in a movie, and I thought to myself, why not? No commitment on my part, I don’t show up alone (and looking like a loser), and I’ll have a great time. Google brought me to Cupid’s and the pictures did not disappoint. I decided that I would want to meet a Companion just to see if there was truth in Cupid’s advertising. I had been fooled on the dating apps, and didn’t want to be fooled here.

I booked my first ever date with a Cupid and decided to keep it simple with dinner. If we hit it off, I would see if I could re-book for the wedding in a few weeks. Or another Companion. As long as she would help me not look like a loser at the wedding.

When she walked in for our first date, I got a little nervous; there was NO way anyone was going to believe that this stunning woman would ever choose me in real life. Over our appetizers, I struggled to make eye contact and felt like I was asking Marie Patterson to dance at our 8th grade dance. My Companion leaned in and said, “you don’t have to be nervous; you’re in good hands.”

I took a deep breath and explained my wedding dilemma and the added trouble of not being able to take her because she was way out of my league. She smiled and said, “wouldn’t that be better?” I didn’t see how, but as our first date progressed, I realized that it would be amazing.

My Companion was right: if I’m going to win this breakup, why no go for the gold? Why not set a record? We started to talk more about how it would look to everyone if I was having a good time with a woman like her and I was really loving the idea.

Until Cupid broke my heart: she wasn’t on the schedule the week of the wedding.

We talked about other Cupid’s who would be up for some wedding fun and then focused on the night ahead of us. The next morning, I kept flashing back to our date. The gleam of mischief in her eyes, her laugh, and even the way we looked together. It was a fit. What really clinched it for me was that she understood why I needed this win.

Plus. After that first date, I really wanted another.

I called Cupid’s and made a special request to see if she would be available for the whole weekend and crossed my fingers. I gave myself until 3 days before the wedding to make a decision on another Cupid, but then…

YES!
Cupid came through. My Companion accepted my offer to be a Travel Companion for the weekend. Three whole days in cottage country with her and three whole days for my ex to see HER with ME. #winning

My sister’s wedding was a three day affair with the big rehearsal dinner the night before and brunch the day after. I explained the vibes to the booker and confirmed that my Companion would be ready for all events. So I have to confess: I don’t remember much about the wedding day because I was on such a high from the night before. Thanks to traffic, we arrived just as everyone was about to eat. People had their mouths open but no one was eating food. Just one glance at my Companion stopped people dead in their tracks. My sister’s eyes visibly widened and my BIL’s face looked like a man who realized he had made a huge mistake (haha he hadn’t. My sister’s amazing). The look on my ex’s face was worth every last penny I spent on this date.

I knew from her expression that she didn’t believe I pulled a woman like this, but my Companion came through instantly. My ex approached us at the bar and made small talk (aka trying to fish for details). She started by asking us how we met:

“Online! Can you believe it?” my Companion asked.

My ex looked at me and said, “I’m actually finding it a little hard to be honest.”

Every question she asked, my date had an answer. Sure, I had given her a little background as prep, but she remembered every detail. What really clinched it was her describing our first date and I worried that she was out of my league. While I watched her talk, I found myself wishing that she was real. But I came back to reality when I remembered that part of the fun is that this was a fantasy I got to live and enjoy. So that’s what I did for the rest of the weekend. I rode that high from Friday night all the way back to my job on Monday morning.

The cherry on top? My EX texted me on the Monday after to say it was nice to have seen me on the weekend and suggested we catch up over coffee. I declined. Not because of “my girl”, but because I realized that I was really over her and that feeling? Worth every penny.

 

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